ramblings

fact: we are on the brink of summer and with that comes much change and transition...hopefully smooth. i believe that this summer will define more of who i am and who i want to be more than any other time in my life. yes, a bit melodramatic however it is true. yesterday was actually the 2 the two year mark since i graduated from baylor...time disappears and remains a mystery, and i have changed.

one of my greatest (selfish) fears before graduating was that i would not have the same opportunity to be mentored or mentor students. i was so afraid of change that i couldn't see the positive experiences that were to come or ask God for them, but God gave them to me anyways. and now, in this time of transition i feel as though i know better than to let my fears outweigh God's provision in my life. i see glimpses from time to time of the selfish girl who still wants to be protected and pruned and i know that my role is different now. i can feel God calling me back to my former role again...and i must be crazy but i am so excited.

and this excitement is mixed with sadness because the team is leaving. but they are going to live the great commission...incredible. i am more encouraged by their passion and trust that it has created a stirring in me to live as Christ commanded. my unintelligible ramblings are in earnest to share where God has lead us all and He continues to move among us if we only recognize the call. don't be afraid to answer because it will be uncomfortable...there is no greater comfort than that of the Father. He is everything glorious!

what a difference 7 years makes

I had the opportunity to speak this morning in front of our middle school students and i didn't intend to share such a personal time in my life. in fact, i had never actually talked about my freshman year of college in front of more than 3 people at one time. it was the darkest, loneliest place i have ever been and for obvious reasons i try to never think about it, but it just seemed like the right thing share. and it is less of an embarrassment now because back then i begged God not to leave me in that pit...and He didn't...He is Glorious and Holy.

And I want all of us to know that our justification for doing immoral things doesn't hinge on our circumstances. Our level of despair does not give us license to hurt anyone...including ourselves. and like i said this morning, our constant and consistent communication with God will only make situation better even if it is to know and fear God when there are no results to be found. I believe that God can save anyone because he has saved me so much from the lies i have told myself over and over again. His love exposes our motives, deceitfulness, and the intentions of our hearts. Hope still remains as does love and faith.

I can only encourage you to share and give what has been given to you. Those of you who feel the absence of anything godly should tell someone...we want to know and we need to know. Do not continue on this journey alone. We are here...I am here for you. Oh Love, that you would be glorified in our sacrifices and humility.

another year

happy birthday dad! we love you and i miss you! 70 days...we can't wait!

Lito's 80th Birthday!

My grandpa's 80th Birthday was awesome! Thanks to everyone who was able to come...it meant so much to him and to us! We are blessed!

switchfoot part deux

switchfoot dallas

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this was definitely a good night!

switchfoot tonight baby!

A little more than 7 hours until show time for switchfoot...i plan to take lots of pictures! amazing...super excited...fabulous!

new site

check out the new site & tell me what you think!
http://web.mac.com/jessicagarza
if you are not a mac user, the site is best viewed on firefox!

vague idea

with all that's gone on in the last month or so, i feel new. like i was just dropped here and left to find my way out...more like alice in wonderland than anything else. and i have help, you know...the same people that i always ask except they can't tell me what to do. what happened to all the cut and dry? black and grey? good and bad? it's too vague now...we're talking about leaving...me and all my personalities. and where is it all supposed to be? where is it that i'm supposed to be? and its funny because it used to terrify to ask these questions of myself, but now i feel as though they are necessary and comforting. and i'm not scared because love doesn't stop because our addresses change. i wish i could be more vague for you. and i'm more excited than i can say. and there is more clairity here in this place not because i know what will happen, but instead because i am not afraid to welcome the change that is inevitable. it is time to stop thinking about what i'm not (i'm not a well adjusted mother of 4, carpool and diet coke) and begin embracing what i have always been...me, alone and untangled. and that's not frightening anymore. so what changed? i may never know...but i have a slight idea. i will become all of them.

Day 1

“Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances,
for this is God’s will for you in Jesus Christ.” 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

restoring humanity

i cannot begin to explain how proud i am of our students this Christmas season. not only were they able to raise thousands of dollars to help families in need, they were able to give more than gifts...they gave many people hope. i thank you on behalf of the families i am blessed to work with on a daily basis. you can change lives...you have already done it!

congratulations theodore!

congratulations to my best friend for getting a new job...congratulations to me for calling about insurance...congratulations to us that we're still friends. and remember to help someone today and if you need help, ask for it...there is beauty in that...

consciousness

i didn't die coming home tonight
my sister was stupid enough to say a racial slur today
there are no magic coats in the world...only those who are stupid enough to pay $200 dollars and those more stupid to buy them
school will not be closed tomorrow
we have 4 coats left
i still have hope for jim and pam
O.R. loves hot cheetos...they all do
where did all the good people go?
early release is for hustlers
i think about it all the time

new page

although it has been a while since i have written here, i feel that i have learned more about the people i know and myself than any other time. and even though i at times miss the comfortable office and the idealist attitude that i have all the answers because i work in ministry i am so grateful that God has changed my mindset. maybe designing shirts and brochures and booking bands aren't where its at...cool as it may be and as much as i would like it to change my identity and make me more "spiritual", it would never be the right focus. working in this new place as an advocate for these kids has opened my eyes to what i have been missing. i met a girl today who just wanted more to eat. i know that she would not get a hot meal for dinner...i know she won't have clean clothes to wear to school tomorrow and i know that if she set foot in a church the other girls would ask her why she looked like that. and it breaks my heart that i can't fix the entire situation. i can only help her by meeting her needs one at a time. and so while i think that at times we need to spiritually energized, i have to wonder if we are really doing the right work if we don't see what is before us. the fact is that people are going hungry within 5 miles of where we all live, children have to parent themselves, and where does it all end? i'm glad that i don't have a comfortable chair to sit in anymore...i don't even have a desk chair or a desk for that matter. go where the people are. go with an attitude of love rather than change. God forbid we reproduce people just like us. let them see unconditional love...lets do the work we have prepared for.

mood:hopeful

it has been a crazy last month or so with job prospects and settling in to my own skin. it is amazing to me how much i need to trust God. i have gotten so far from it...immune almost to need. and well...i have to admit it. so i pray that God would make it increasingly difficult to live without Him. and even though i have even less than i started out with earlier this morning i am glad that someone is taking things away from me that do not contribute to who i am meant to be. so here''s to letting the little things remain little. it's just a mum, baseball glove, a job, and a friend. it's all small stuff if i allow it to be.

freakin idiot!

whether we believe what the media reports about the T.O. situation or not i have a problem with the way in which it was handled by dale hansen. i do not believe he should've stated that he didn't like Terrell or call Coach Parcels incompetent. it is amazing to me that a man who despises so much about the players and the way teams are run would still allow himself to take money for something he obviously opposes. and i don't believe that making 10 million a year makes someone less human. dale hansen to my knowledge was never hired to give his opionions but instead to report stats and set up highlights. so i would urge this guy to actually be a man and perhaps walk away from his position. it's amazing how many people kick others who are down. just contributing to the discussion. 

dear John

i will always remember the sign that they placed in their yard for Christmas. It had an angel on it with a very large "Merry Christmas from the Shoemakers". And they were the Shoemakers up until the phone rang tonight at 11:00.

It had been a rough 3 years for John physically. He had been through strokes, a massive heart attack and a brain tumor. and through it all his wife, my mother's best friend was the strength for us. most of the time they were more at peace with everything than we were. and so i will always think of john as an incredible husband and friend. he became a father to his nephew and niece without asking. he loved and served his church as much as he could even when he was sick. he got it right...

so i thank you John for what you have given us in lesson and in life. thank you for taking me to the beach and the mountains. thank you for all of the pictures and shirts from all over. thank you for letting me pretend that your dog was mine. thank you for supporting me and my life goals. thank you for loving your wife so much...i will remember your example forever. and we'll take care of our girl.

pappy lives!

happy birthday to the one and only pappy! it kinda freaks me out though when you come at me when you're pretending to be a dinosaur. i know it's your birthday and you should get what you want but i already got you a shirt and there's more where that came from if you quit scaring me. just something to think about...seriously though, thanks for always helping me solve my very very important problems. and you're my favorite person to have coffee with...well i have coffee and you have ice cream but whatever. love you jake...

united mindset

check out my sweet new copywriting gig at unitedmindset.com...just a few twenty-somethings that are living the dream. they are really talented guys! take chances people...God doesn't give you a dream for you NOT to do something about it...(i realize that it usually takes more than 5 months for things to work out and for that i am incredibly grateful!) sweet action!

Free Taitlin?

What's this nonsense about a Free Taitlin tee? Can someone find out if there are extras please!?!

Student Life at the Beach!

so student life at the beach was not quite what i expected...it was actually very relaxing. i enjoyed the idea of being relaxed when going in to hear voddie speak as opposed to tired, sweaty, and still hungry from "dinner". it as if all of our needs were met in order for us to listen better and that is no coincidence. it was a great time of building new relationships, repairing old ones and creating more funny stories than i can recall at once. i will leave you with one question... what is phroneo christou?