Lita's ICU Stay

Well Friends, I'm writing from a surprisingly comfy hospital bed in my grandmother's room at Medical City Dallas. She is doing well and getting stronger everyday. I am pleased to right this update using a fabulous wireless signal as well! Gotta Love that! It has been a slow process of recuperation after the surgery on Monday to remove her colon cancer. She had a crazy Tuesday night, too. The doctors would only describe it as a cardiac event, but they later told my mom that she went into cardiac arrest. Regardless of what it was, Lita did not suffer any more damage to her heart, but her kidneys are not doing too hot. I guess they are just trying to recover from the surgery. They have taken her off more medication today and she has been sitting in a chair for most of the afternoon. She did demand a footstool/ottoman and they were nice enough to find one for her. Lita looks pretty fantastic. I've always thought she is really beautiful and she is coming around. She is sleeping a ton, but she has not suffered any pain from the surgery.And her bed is moving now! It freaked me out the first time it happened, but its all good. And my Lito has just asked for an Ipod for his feet...we don't know, but i'm trying to google what he wants. He doesn't really know what it does. I'm getting right on that. He just suggested the F-Pod...Yeah...too funny!
Please pray that she can eat soon. All she can have is ice chips right now and that just won't do. Please pray for my granddaddy and our extended family as we take turns coming up to the hospital next week. Please pray for mom as she is out of town next week on business and for me as I fill in for her and try to take care of my granddad. We are very optimistic as a family and continue to trust that the Lord is glorified and working for the good!

Lita's Surgery

My grandmother will be having surgery tomorrow at 1:30pm. Please pray that the doctors can remove all the cancer successfully without any complications. We are also praying that the cancer has not spread to her lymph nodes. She is super strong and believes that this will all be taken care of after this week! I believe it, too. She will be in the hospital all week long and I will not be able to give updates because I will be out of town (*camp in corpus christi, tx)...no internet service...boo! God is in complete control and we ask for His Grace & Mercy. I will give you an awesome report on Friday!
*Please pray for camp this week: brent warren, the cgband, the kiddos, the staffers, and leadership. This will not just be an ordinary week.

Update on my Sis: She is doing very well and got her first paycheck (she really earned that one). I pray that she continues to have influence on her friends, but that she would draw close to her Savior and Love. She sounds wonderful and is beginning to make important life decisions. I do ask that you pray for rest for her. She is having trouble sleeping at night, but I know that God is continually calling her name and giving her strength. I am so proud of her and pray for her protection and maturity always. She is the most beautiful girl!
Lastly, I love ya'll so much! Thanks for hanging in there with me and the crazy schedules and traveling. I hope to get back to normal in the month of August! I appreciate you all so much and wouldn't want to do life without you all. Thank you.

The Jungle!

it was definitely not my intention to spend an hour rifling through my closet today. i should've been preparing for camp, even packing for it, but i just couldn't resist. this time last year i was at the height of my shop-a-holic binge and thank goodness! i found 3 designer dresses and a brand new pair of shoes hidden in the back of my closet! what a wonderful day. i have had several more important areas to give money to these days and i was so excited to find a few beautiful things in that jungle. i won't even have to repeat an outfit from last year's cruise! i have so much and i do wear it all occasionally, but its good to know i have it on reserve. i just glad that i don't need anything else! woo hoo!

its been a year since my last fashion tip of the day:
everyone should have a very tailored, little black dress --one for summer and fall. if you think audrey hepburn, you won't go wrong! classic styles never look old! go forth and dress well!

iChat

Well, it has been an insane week with recovering from last week, being sick, being with my grandma, talking with my sister and brother and being away from Josh. There is no cell phone service where he is this week and so we've been relying on facebook and emails to communicate until today! We finally got iChat to work and were able to see each other for a whole hour this afternoon. I cannot begin to tell you how awesome I feel after that little interaction. It is so difficult to be away from each other like this, but I look forward to little things to help us through. I am trying not to take our time for granted and hope that we keep up the communication via cameras for the rest of the week. We will get to be together for the next two weeks beginning this Monday! Yay! We can make it!

Manic Monday

Today I...

Woke up with no voice and no desire to go the doctor.

Went to work at 8am.

Decided to go see the Sex In the City Movie by myself in honor of Meg's Birthday. I feel like she is the ultimate city girl and I know that if we were in the same city, we would've definitely gone to see it!

Cried through the entire movie because I was so inspired to work on my writing and not give up on that.

Decided to enjoy my love of fashion.

Discovered that the $16,000 Louis Vuitton bag that Joshua found on Ebay was in Sex In the City! He has good instincts.

Wore my heavy rain boots to the doctor just in time for the down pour.

Have a sinus infection, ear infections, and antibiotics.

Had to get a cortizone shot in the hip.

Recieved a joking yet mean email from one of my good buddies...never thought that would happen.

Answered that stupid email in anger.

Ran 4 miles in 43 minutes!

Missed Joshua something awful.

Prayed for more patience than usual.

Joshua's Birthday Parties

We celebrated Joshua's 30th Birthday in Louisiana, South Carolina, and Texas this year! You only turn 30 once especially on May 30th...cool huh? And the parties were all very very fun! The first cake was a cookie monster! We also had an awesome crawfish boil thanks to Kevin! How cute is my niece? Fo Real! And she just lost another tooth. I'm missing those kiddos!


I love this picture and I bought the card about 3 years ago to give to my future fiance...it's pretty hilarious! I'm so glad I finally got to give it away!
Here we are at Myrtle Beach! This was such a great morning! And yes, Joshua broke his first birthday pinata that day. I also put up posters all over to let everyone know it was his bday! We had fun!



And Josh got super powers for his birthday...he can do headstands on cue now...

And we had cupcakes in Dallas with my fam! It was a good night with fajitas and homemade tortillas! ay! ay! ay! It was wonderful to celebrate Josh's Birthday in a big way...can't wait till next year!

Brotherly Love

I don't really know how I feel about this post being that it happened to my sister. Please pray for her and her friends. Read about it here and here.

I will post more thoughts later...

Greetings from South Carolina!

hey ya'll!
it's Jessica and Joshua...well, i'm typing and he is editing. we made it to myrtle beach with only a little bit of car sickness...so shocking! we have had a good time although i have to be honest that it is difficult to be in a van with 7 other people for two days...for one thing, i'm used to being alone and it has been an adjustment, but as with all new things it will take some time to get used to. please pray that our trip home has no sickness...please please pray that my stomach stays healthy all week, not just the car trip. in addition, please pray for josh and me as we attempt to learn more about how to be a couple at camp...i've had a few minor freakouts already. and you all know my high maintenance personality...i don't need to have a melt down here this week. he is such a good man for always being there.

Update on my Lita: we know nothing! nada! zilch! we have not heard from the doctor about ct results and we are all apprehensive but believing God to do a great work...MIRACLE.

anywho, that's what this week is about...he's playing and i'm helping lead a group of kiddos that i've never met. fun stuff! love it so much...some how i never thought this would be my life, but the Lord is Good.

Lita's CT

Well, the lasted update on Lita is simply that we are now waiting for results from a CT scan. We should know something Tuesday. I do ask that you pray for Lita's spirit. She sounds very broken and hopeless at this point and I just hate that. She still has plenty of fight left and we pray that she realizes that. It is a difficult spot to be in especially since I can't be there. Everything will end up like it should and I will not worry. Please pray for the spunky lady we all know and love.

Lita's Cancer

Lita went in for a routine colonoscopy this morning and they found that she does have colon cancer. We were not prepared for that result at all...It almost doesn't seem real, but I continue. She will need to have surgery to remove as much as possible and then perhaps treat with radiation and chemo. She will meet with an oncologist sometime soon (I assume I will be out of town) and then go from there. Mom, Lito and I have told her the doctor's findings this afternoon and it was difficult, but necessary. She was understandably upset, but we are optimistic.

Please pray for my mom in the coming weeks as she has a mom who needs care and support and for my grandpa as well. I have to think selfishly about this and just pray that she can make it to the wedding. I honestly can't think about anything else because she has wanted this so bad. We will know more once we meet with doctors and find out how much and if it has spread tomorrow and early next week. It breaks my heart that this would touch her. Please please pray for us. We love her more than we could ever express. Please pray for me as I won't get to be there if she needs me. This does not mean that this will claim her life. We just need more time. We have to get more time. I will keep you updated as it comes. Thank you all again!

Be mercifiul to us, O Gracious Father! We give you Praise and Thanks Always! Your Glory be Known!

Memorial Weekend!

OK...I'm off again for about a week and a half for Josh's 30th Birthday and Myrtle Beach, South Carolina for Beach Camp. It should be a great time and I will post pictures when I can. Trust me, you'll want to see a pinata madness of 2008! Fo Real! Love ya'll! And thank you for all of the support for our engagement! Means the world!

New Stuff

Hey All! I've been MIA for half a month now but I've been working hard while traveling so check out the new stuff on my photography blog. Here is a preview! I've had alot of new influences and have been working on a new look for pictures...Let me know what you think!

Meet the Grammons!

Okay Ya'll! I really hesitate to put this on my blog because it is so precious to me, but I love you guys and know that you want to hear it!

We got back from visiting my family in Texas City on Friday night and as usual, tired Jessica, I was stressed about something stupid and quite frazzled. I think it was a combo of being tired and sitting for 5 hours straight...very hard to do for an ADD child. Saturday morning was really easy going. We got up and had some tea. I ate a banana while Josh, his mom and I chatted over breakfast. We needed to get moving for the day and as we usually do, we needed to go pray.
We sat on the edge of my bed at his parent's house.
"Marry Me," I asked. I usually asked him to marry me atleast once a day because thats the kind of girl I am.
"I will marry you," he replied. "Wait, I need to ask you if you will marry me, but I need to get down on one knee and ask."
"You're not going to ask me to marry you," I said as I pulled on him to get up off of the floor. "You're not serious."
"Be my wife, Jessica," He said. I still didn't think he was actually proposing to me.
"I will be your wife." I said it with all sincerity, but not thinking it was actual moment.
"Do you want your ring?" His voice changed completely from one of contemplative to excitement in less than a second.
"No way. You don't have my ring!" I just knew he didn't have my ring yet. I don't think I even realized that he really was asking me to marry him.

He runs back to his room. I hear shuffling and doors slamming and then he is kneeling in front of me with his left hand closed tightly around the ring. I still didn't believe that he had it in his hand. He took a minute before we started to pray. There were tears and kisses and after we said, "Amen," he slipped the ring on my finger.

I was absolutely in shock for the rest of the day. It was a very surreal experience for us, but a holy time, too. He got me good which was his main goal. I still can't believe that he puts up with me and has agreed to for the rest of our lives. I am so blessed to have him in my life and can't wait to get hitched in November. I love him more every day and am so lucky to be girl who said, "yes!"

travels

our trip to galveston was really awesome! here are a few of the places we visited while we were there! the last few photos are from our cake tasting on The Strand...let me recommend having at least 3 of these a year...cake tastings! Oh Yeah! And I'm getting to the good stuff with the proposal...calm down!

TC

I've gotten some feedback about being busy lately and that is an understatement, but it has been the best two weeks! Last week Josh and I were in Louisiana and this week we've been at my parents house in Texas City. Everything has gone very well although I am very sad to leave my bro and sis. Here are a few pics from the last couple of weeks.

tired

oooh...it's been an extremely long monday that ended about 4am and began at this morning 10am. i wish i could do something to stop this rat race, but it has been difficult lately. yesterday was fun though...i was able to take a few pictures of my friend lee and his brother...it was an interesting shoot and one that i probably won't forget. i post this picture, complete with teacher face, to show that i hate having my picture taken most of the time. this definitely changes things for those of you who think i'm photogenic!

i should be asleep!

well, for the first time in a long while i'm a little too excited to sleep. i had the best night at family dinner. for those of you who don't know about our family dinners, they are epic and super important to the friends i've grown up with! i've had the same friends for the last 12 years or so and we are more like brothers and sisters at this point. and now things are really changing with people moving out of state, going to iraq, and just growing up in general. we've all been through alot in the last few months with the first baby to have come and gone in what seems like a breath. we all need each other as much as we did when we were 16 years old and it is good to have a place to call home. today we celebrated Jeremy's new puppy, Jake! i must've held that little guy for about an hour while he slept. i absolutely adore this family that we've made and it will never leave me no matter where i am. i am so lucky to have everything i need.

i'm also super pumped about spending the next 2 weeks with joshua! that's right people--we're taking a road trip down to meet the family in good old t.c. i really can't believe it! it should be a fabulous time of family and i hope he doesn't hold their weirdness against me and i just hope they can hold it together for their guest. i hate to say that they operate on a totally different side of normal...more like panic mode...but it should go well. i just can't believe that we will get to be together for 3 weeks in may. i can't wait. so i'll basically be traveling for the next 2 weeks. yay! i love this! p.s. i've never brought a guy home to meet my dad...pray for us if the thought crosses your mind!

Last Week

Wahoo! Last week was a little insane because I did my first band trip, but it was awesome! I had so much fun and the guys were so kind. We made it to the Memphis area without any major glitches although we had a rough start. The time at Trinity was great and it was good to have a preview of camp with Larsen. I also stayed with the Kirks again! I have been so lucky to see the First Carrollton fam so much in the last couple of months. I miss them so much!

And I do have to say that it is a bit of an adjustment to see Josh play on stage although I've seen him plenty of times. I guess its just that when I think of him, I don't immediately think, Josh from the CGB, but about him as a person and not what he does for a living. He is pretty amazing and I love him.

Dallas Visit

Joshua came to visit two weeks ago and we had a wonderful time although the time was too short! I guess I like these pictures because they're normal life and I like routine. I also like the pic of Josh because it was the first time he drove my car and I made him not only drive on the Bush Turnpike, but the Tollway, too. It was a little funny and yes, I know I cut his head off.

Lito turns 81!

Well, my grandfather turned 81 years old a few days ago and to make things more interesting, we lit it up...literally! I stole the idea but we did have mini 81 candle bonfire. There was a little hesitation before we lit the thing up, but it was fun and Lito's expression was priceless. It was a great time!

Well, the trip to Louisiana was fabulous. I loved every minute and was so sad to go home. Although the distant is just for a season, I need to not look at it as an obstacle, but be instead as a positive. I want to enjoy every moment and the miles between us makes me acknowledge that.

I did have my first experience with Louisiana food and miraculously, I somehow lost weight last week. I finally ate at Copeland's for the first time! It was awesome. We ate corn crab bisque and blackened catfish with red potatoes. I also had crawfish, duck, and gumbo for the first time. Yes, it is a miracle that I lost weight. And there we desserts a plenty. I can't believe I was such a pig. I will probably do it all again though, but only in Louisiana.

It was just a great time to do life together for a while. There was nothing quite like driving through Louisiana listening to the Black Crowes and watching my aviator-wearing man sing along. Those types of snapshots are so good for my soul. I'm so blessed.
Birthday Cake!

Discussion of music
Joshua's mean face...I think its pretty cute :)
My Fave! He's so precious!

Life

So I've haven't had a chance to do to much in the way of blogging the last few days. I've had plenty of thoughts, but no desire to share them...stingy me. I am currently in Alexandria, Louisiana listening to a band rehearsal and stealing a little wi-fi...maybe not stealing. The trip has been great so far. Yesterday we were in Shreveport, Ruston, and Ball, Louisiana. We stopped along the way for me to meet some new friends! I feel like I don't make very good first impressions on people, but everyone has their shortcomings. Hopefully, next time will be better and more relaxed on my part.

I did have Copeland's today for first time. God Bless the state of Louisiana and the fine people who actually know how to cook! It was a lovely meal. I shamelessly ate crab bisque, a caesar salad, and blackened catfish...well, Josh and I split it. Yay for having a new favorite restaurant!

And I finally saw Jenny for the first time in 3 months. I'm such a bad friend! We had so much fun at lunch and I hope to see her on Monday again! She's having an art show next month and I'll post more details on it later. Trust me, its totally worth a drive out to Tyler to see her work!

My grandmother is doing well after being out of the hospital for almost a week! We did switch all of her new doctors back to the doctors she had previously. After some Doogie Howser wanna-be almost did an insane amount of damage to her heart a couple of weeks ago during a routine stress test. We believe we know what the source of internal bleeding, too! We are so thankful to her *new* old doctors. She has been to the beauty shop to have her hair done and to Wal-Mart as well. She is still working on my granddaddy for cable, but she did just get a flat screen tv! We watched a suspense thriller on Easter as a family...Yeah, we know how wrong how that is, but it was a good flick.

So that's life for a Thursday night...God is Great!

thoughts

In preparation for our gathering tonight, I had to re-read my book. So far I have to say that I haven't connected with it as much as others. But it made me think this afternoon about church culture, secret sin, labels, and being a friend of sinners. A little more than a year ago, I was asked to speak to our student ministry at Carrollton. Reid gave me the topic I was supposed to cover and I could've spoken about it, but that would be too easy. I guess after seeing so many marginalized people in my work life and with the Corbins being who they are, I decided to speak without preparing.

As I spoke, I could see a few of the kids expressions. They looked uncomfortable and I could feel it. I began to speak about things that were only difficult to live through, but hard to hear. And I didn't get any positive response back, there was no warmth, only true examples of the life Christ changed. In those few minutes, I feel like I changed the way those kids would look at me forever not because of what I did but because I was honest about my struggles. I no longer held the title of "having it together". And I feel like the less we know about people, the better we feel about our own failures because there is less of a connection. And that is precisely why we don't serve people because if we saw the needs in others, we wouldn't be able to ignore how close we all are to being them or accepting the fact that we have issues with getting our own junk together. (I'm assuming that we are thinking we are better than the people we're serving...its an American mindset).

After speaking, I sat down at the base of the stairwell and processed a bit. I didn't know if I had done the right thing. Shortly after, Tim came and sat down beside me. He put is arm around me and said, "You've done well, Jess. I'm proud of you." About 5 minutes later, he offered me a job. Its not so scary to put things out there. I'm no illusionist and don't care to be one.

Wednesday Update!

Hey Friends! Lita was moved out of ICU this morning and into a private room! It is amazing news! She is returning to her speedy racer ways! We are pumped for her. Thank you for all of the prayers! Her greatest hope is to be home for Easter and we pray that happens!

In other weird news, if American Idol can allow talentless people butcher Beatles songs, then I can listen to Britney Spears. Gimme More Ya'll! I post this with confidence because I spent the morning listening to The Black Crowes while working. I guess thats what happens when your musician-boyfriend finally shows you what music should sound like. Poor Brit's days are numbered with me.

Monday::Intensive Care

Well...Lita is pretty much stable although the doctors are worried about possible leakage from enzymes around her heart. They know what they're doing and I don't so I'll just let them put their years of schooling to work. They would like to do a procedure on her and we are assured that her body can take it. I'm not sure what to think because it was a stress test that got us into this mess in the first place. They need to find the source of the internal bleeding and hopefully this will be part of the solution.

Super Lita has had it with the non-communication portion of ICU and is proposing that my granddaddy smuggle in a cell phone for her. She doesn't want people to call her, but she is sure she needs it to contact us. I can definitely understand her point, but the lady loves to chat and I'm afraid they're going to confiscate it like they did her hairbrushes. Update: They took the second hairbrush and we got her a comb and she says its not the same. Let the woman have a brush! She's flipping 85 years old! She has a secret stash of goodies now and hopefully Sandra won't happen upon it.

Super Lita also has an issue with the food they are serving her. Mother is on a mission to sneak a few things in for her, but again, I am afraid Sandra will bust up the entire operation. I wouldn't eat the crap they are serving her either. She needs a good hamburger. I'll let you know what develops, but this has fiasco written all over it. Its times like this that I'm glad I write from personal experience because these cute little anecdotes write themselves.

I'll be at the hospital by 10am tomorrow to spend some time with her. Somehow I don't quite feel old enough to walk through an ICU wing by myself. I remember how scared I used to be of that part of the hospital, but now its different. I feel like I have to make her feel comfortable there, but then again there has always been a familiarity between the two of us that is different from the rest of the family. When no one is looking, I rest on her bed. I know thats a huge no-no, but thats all I really have now so I don't really think its a terrible thing to break the rules. Besides, she has climbed into my hospital bed plenty of times and its my turn now. She gets more beautiful by the day. And the way my Lito loves her is indescribable. The staff has allowed him to stay with her as long as he wants and we are grateful for that. I feel like my heart expands more every day, but part of it just hurts because I know the ending. And I guess I don't really get to talk about this too much because there are other things to occupy my thoughts. She knows how much I adore her...I do adore her.

Sunday::Intensive Care

Super Lita continues to make a comeback. Today we were able to enjoy the Mavs game together and that was quite an experience to keep her quiet in the Intensive Care Unit. What can we say? She loves her Mavs! Thankfully, it wasn't too much of a nail biter because El Miami Heat stink like dirty feet.

We do know what is wrong with her now although I do not feel the need to share that at this time. It was great to have her doctor personally call my Mom to tell her about Lita's condition. Lita and I actually prayed about that at lunch time and to see it happen was unbelievable! I also let her keep my hot pink Bible today because they couldn't find one for her. She likes to tell all the nurses that her granddaughter studies out of a hot pink Bible. Hot pink is not unholy!

And now for the big story of the day! After her "bird bath" this morning, Nurse Sandra brushed her hair and then made off with her hairbrush. I believe she has filed a report with ICU security. My mother graciously gave her a brush although it is not the same and we have mourned the loss and continue to hope for the best. We are grateful to Sandra but Super Lita calls her a thief now and says that Sandra's hair is always freshly brushed. God is continuing to do a great work in our family and we thank Him for it.

SaturdayNight::Intensive Care

Well, it has been a long, intense day, but I am glad to share that Lita is doing much better! She is stable and her blood levels as well as her blood pressure is great! She has requested that I visit her tomorrow for lunch and then again at dinner time to watch part of the Mavs game with together!

My granddaddy is feeling much better as a result of Lita's great progress. We have had the pleasure of eating every meal together as an extended family today and look forward to that again tomorrow. Lito has kept Lita laughing and occupied with stories and his jokes as always. (I highly recommend checking out Reader's Digest for new material). It has been a blessing to have everyone here. God is good.

Saturday::Intensive Care

My lita was moved into ICU this afternoon because she was having difficulty breathing, high blood pressure, and a possible heart attack. She is receiving a transfusion and she is looking much better.

She is so upset that she was moved into ICU and has been very emotional about it as most would expect. It has been difficult to watch as a family, but we are more confident in the Lord than ever and ask that you pray with us for Lita's health. She is so physically tired, but mentally strong. The Lord knows all of our concerns. Thanks & love ya'll.

Wednesday Afternoon

I don't believe it was a smart idea to order a Green Tea Latte at Starbucks tonight, but I have been reflecting on the day and the boss will probably be cool if I sleep a little late. It was a great day to spend time with Josh and his family. I thank God for allowing us to have that time especially since we've been able to see each other for the last 3 weeks while living in Texas & Louisiana! I am really digging the pictures and this just goes to show you that there is beauty in the simplest of things!

charlie

i'm in love with the dog i'm house sitting. we enjoy taking long walks and spending quality time together. he even jumps up to give me hugs. he's pretty great and i don't want to give him back. he will be staying with us for a few more days!

Wednesday

i've tried writing a blog on this topic for a few days now and it still doesn't seem to come as easy to me as i hoped. trust me, i have plenty to say, but i feel as though it is more important to keep some things private for privacy sake. i am excited and a little overwhelmed, but more so in awe of the Father's love for us and His plans.

My life is completely different than it was 3 months ago...completely new! And I know that it might be wrong to say it, but if this is as good as it gets, then I have more than I need or want. Trust me, I still ask for my share of blessings, wisdom, and some crazy stuff on the side, but this is enough. I guess I am trying to enjoy what I have now instead of asking for more. It will all come with time and those will be great days, but I am joyfully content in what God has bestowed upon me. I want to enjoy this part of the journey. The Father continues to surprise me everyday and I won't ever be worthy of it...that's His Love.

Today was such a great day! I really can't believe it! Wednesday is my new favorite day of the week. Every girl should be so lucky.